We've got a big game down at Miami today, as 8-2 Virginia Tech has come to town with the Coastal Division potentially at stake against the 7-3 Hurricanes. Big game of great consequence! November football! Packed house, right?

That's from Andy Staples' twitter feed, about 15 minutes before kickoff. And this just doesn't make sense. Sure, Miami fans are notoriously fickle when it comes to attendance, but that? That's horrible. Maybe 10,000 in the seats, but that doesn't seem likely.

And it doesn't even make sense, since Miami's not really terrible this season or anything. Surely, their attendance ought to be higher! So either A: their fans are invisible and/or ghosts, which is already plenty scary, or -- and we're inclined to believe this -- B: someone's killing Miami fans at an alarming rate. There are no reports of a serial killer on the loose down there, though. But an inconspicuous serial killer? In south Florida? Wait a second...

Cut it out, Dexter! That's too much murder!